Category Archives: Family

Dogz in the club

A video is worth ten thousand words.

Advertisements

This Blog Feels Like Home…

…so I’m going to put a picture up on the fridge. Cuinn is 5.

The Shadow Knows…

… that aliens, apparently, live among us.

Virginia Kids, Illinois Snow

And unseasonably deep and cold Illinois, too. While we’ve been visiting family this last month, it has been more like December than November.

I haven’t gotten this much cold and snow all at once since my family left Wisconsin when I was 11.

It has been a nice walk down nostalgia lane, and great fun to watch my little ones experience it. 🙂

It’s Gargoyle Laundry Day…

…at the old homestead. Hard to find a quiet moment.

Baby Schnitzel

schnitzel-eat-1740723-pixabay-cc0-pubdom

Pixabay always has the best public domain stuff even if this one came without a background. The poor thing.

To begin let me clear up some ambiguity in the title: this is about making small schnitzel, not about how to make schnitzel out of babies. If you’re here for the latter, I’m sorry you have to leave disappointed.

So: I discovered today why my mom and grandma always made these little bitty schnitzel barely big enough to cover a store brand hamburger bun (which happens because cold leftover schnitzel makes AMAZING sandwiches).

I discovered today instead of the last time I made schnitzel because I am stubborn, stubborn, oh so stubborn.

When I usually make schnitzel, I aim to create something that will cover at least half of a dinner plate. I cut nice thick slabs of loin or tenderloin and carefully beat it into a nice big floppy pork blanket. If I’m working with tenderloin, which is a slender muscle that doesn’t make big thick slices, I at least make the schnitzel big enough to cover a large hamburger bun with some hanging out the sides.

Last time, I broke out the tenderloin and went for the meat hammer… but we’d lost it in the move. Okay, fine. I have a decent rolling pin… oh, also lost in the move.

Wanna guess where my last resort, a large stone pestle, went?

You got it.

So that’s when I learned an alternate method of making schnitzel without pounding it outHAHAHAHA no. I am far too stubborn to learn so quickly when I’m not learning on purpose.

Guess what I did.

Go ahead. Guess.

You’re probably wrong because I BEAT THE PORK TENDERLOIN SLICES FLAT WITH MY FISTS. I made schnitzel in a savage, unreasonable, beastly way.

I have German friends. I expect they will have me assassinated in reprisal for my crimes against schnitzelmanity.

But today, today! Today I learned.

And the learning made me realize why my mom and grandmom made little bitty baby schnitzel.

There have been Germans knocking around my mother’s side of the family line for at least a century and maybe two (family history is, sadly, not my strength).

Perhaps grandma’s mom or grandma said to themselves, eh, this Old Country business with hitting the meat with a hammer forever is for the birds. If I just cut the pork thin enough, I can work smarter instead of harder or whatever that dumbass ’90s business cliche was.

Maybe grandma was the one who took laziness to its logical conclusion and stopped hitting the pork with a hammer altogether. Maybe it was mom. Maybe it was great-grandpa, who motivated them to stop hitting the pork with a hammer out of spite because he was a fanatic about hitting the pork with a hammer the proper way, dammit, and would yell at you about it like a jerk.

But someone stopped hitting the pork with a hammer and just cut thin pieces of pork off a tenderloin.

Which is what I learned to do today so I didn’t have to beat my this post is over goodbye.

Commander Kitty Is Unsure…

…as to whether or not he digs his new digs. We humans, though, ARE sure. This is a definite improvement!

I’ve been silent here for a while. We’ve been moving. Goodbye 1968 sub-single-wide trailer home with slowly collapsing floors and significant amounts of black mold.

Hello 2nd floor apartment with balconies in a 100+ year old brick building that has been remodeled enough to (hallelujah!) have a modern amount of electrical sockets.

And there’s a real stove. For SEVEN FRICKIN YEARS I have cooked with electric skillets and hotplates because the trailer had a propane stove and it turns out it’s EXPENSIVE AF to cook (or heat!) with propane.

Finances, as always, remain tight. We’re just happy to be able to juuuuuuust afford to upgrade from substandard housing that would likely be condemned if anyone looked closely, to something decent.

If you’re not already, consider giving my family and writing a boost by checking out my Patreon page.Early blog posts and sometimes exclusive looks at rough drafts, even free ebooks.

Commander Kitty says thanks for reading.

Young Creator

This is a creation from my 4 year old son, Cuinn. Everest of Paw Patrol is flying a spaceship constructed from a stormtrooper Mr. Potatohead. Note the arm in front: that’s a laser cannon. Looks like a propulsion unit in the back with the stormtrooper mask. And the ship has eyes. Why? So it can see where it’s going, duh!

I’m surrounded by creativity and I love it.

We Went Walking And Encountered A Spycat

We didn’t worry about the cat being stuck because have you ever seen a cat skeleton in a tree?

Things The World Doesn’t Need:

…A live action Jetsons reboot.

I get it. Gen X is hitting middle age and we’ve got about as much money as we’ll ever have as a generation. We’ve got kids and some of us have young grandkids (not me yet).

And we like to watch cartoony stuff.

And, it seems to me, we’re practically maudlin in our nostalgia.

We’re a great market for this crap, and so are the millennials whose ears we’ve talked off about how awesome our childhood stuff was.

But still. The world doesn’t need more derivative crap, not least because 99% of it is done AWFULLY. I’d rather see something new.